Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Thoughts on Suffering and Mindfulness

So often, a friend recently exclaimed to me, we see suffering as an interruption to life. Sure, we give lip service to suffering being part of life. When we are in the midst of it, however, we see it as an inconvenience; something that we will to be over so that we can 'get on with life'. 

What would it look like, if we learned to be truly present in all of life, including when we suffer?

Being 'present' in the moment, displaying grace and compassion in letting myself and others be where they're at, living life mindfully. Over the past few months this topic, theme, and thought, has weaved itself through my life. I have found myself considering these things in a variety of situations and experiences.

My younger sister first introduced me to The Slow Movement over a year ago and I have become increasingly interested in this movement which encourages a more mindful life. Mindfulness, as described on The Slow Movement website, "is a Buddhist concept that can be best described as awareness. Awareness of everything, awareness of our senses, our body, our mind." 
Jon Kabat-Zinn, professor emeritus at the University of Massachusetts Medical School believes that “Mindfulness is a certain way of paying attention that is healing, that is restorative, that is reminding you of who you actually are so that you don’t wind up getting entrained into being a human doing rather than a human being.” It opens up new dimensions of well-being and integrity, of wisdom and compassion and kindness in ourself.

This concept is also present in one of my favourite books 'Let Your Life Speak' by Parker Palmer, a Quaker. Through the sharing of, primarily, his own life story, Palmer shares great insight into the importance of getting to know oneself through living a mindful life. He implores the reader not to be dictated to by the expectations of others or self; acting out of a knowledge, relationship and compassion for yourself in choosing the decisions you make and actions you take. There is a Hasidic tale, Palmer tells, that reveals, with amazing brevity, both the universal tendency to want to be someone else (whether that be Buddha, Jesus, Moses, Mandela, Ghandi or anyone else) and the ultimate importance of becoming one's self: 
Rabbi Zusya, when he was an old man, said, "In the coming world, they will not ask me: 'Why were you not Moses?' They will ask me: 'Why were you not Zusya?'"

So what role does mindfulness play in the experience of suffering?
Jesus talked about 'Living life to the fullest'. I believe an attitude of mindfulness in all of life enables a person to get the most out of this life that we have been given. That includes during times of suffering.
I'm a highly emotional person, I experience the whole width and breadth of emotion. I have, as a result, felt at times, that I suffer more than others, because I really feel emotional pain. Whether that is true or not, I wouldn't change it. My experience of life is bigger because of it. 
Wouldn't it be great if we could see suffering like that? To truly embrace our suffering as way of experiencing the whole of what life has to offer?
No matter how much we try, we can't avoid suffering - so why treat it as a disruption to life and therefore cause it to be one?

As a result of a car accident last year, I have been forced to stop working, to stop my involvement in many things and to slow down. At times I have heard myself saying how "I wish I could just feel better". I have seen the suffering I have been, and am, experiencing as an interuption to my life. However, over time, I am discovering a sense of peace, joy and healing that comes with living a slower, more mindful life. I am learning to live a life of becoming more and more myself, where I take time to slow down, to observe and be aware, to 'sit with' what I am feeling physically and emotionally, instead of running away from these things, ignoring them, or being controlled by them.

This Christmas time, as the world seems to speed up and get so much busier, I encourage you to take the time to slow down, explore and consider if and how you might live a more mindful life.

Coffee & Shopping: Croydon, Dandenong Ranges, Richmond

Every now and then, I'll post my recommendations for cafe's, coffee shops and other stores in and around Melbourne and Australia. Unless stated otherwise, places listed are in Victoria.

Here's some I love, and highly recommend you visit!

Croydon

Cafe
Kofi Beans, Main Street.
This place has a great vibe, delicious food and drink, and is both eco & socially conscious. Winner.
Whether you love a good cup of Java (Organic & Fairtrade to boot), one of the best cooked breakfasts in Melbourne, a delicious dinner (made with local organic produce), or a browse around the Moroccan homewares on offer, it's all here.
Inside the cafe, the feeling is cosy. A variety of small tables and, if you're lucky, couches up the front, are a great place to sit and ponder the world or chat with a friend or two. If you enjoy being outside, the courtyard out the back is just gorgeous (and heated in winter).
Sure, it's a little bit pricier than some places, but totally worth it.

Shopping: Clothing
The Red Parasol, Main Street
Just a short walk away from Kofi Beans is this delightful store. Girls - If you're into good quality second hand and reasonably priced vintage clothing and accessories, you must visit The Red Parasol.
The lady who owns this store sources her products through auctions and markets around Australia and has new stock coming in most days.
My younger sister discovered this gem and I have since recruited several other fans.
The great thing about this shop is that it's a great mix of everything you love from both Op Shops and Trendy Vintage Boutiques.
You don't have to sort through too much crap to find the good stuff and yet it won't break the bank like the boutiques do. I found a beautiful Jacques Rue dress, tag still attached (with original price of $149-), I paid just $29. And an extremely cute vintage summer dress - just $12.
There is also an incredible variety of jewellery and other accessories.
Well worth a look - you won't regret it!


Dandenong Ranges

Cafe
Cafe de Beaumarchais, Mt Dandenong Tourist Rd, Sassafrass
I used to visit this shop to buy my coffee - Jasper Fairtrade Organic. There were huge bins of beans, the aroma filling the store and making my mouth water. The bins are now gone, and a new elegant and warm French style of decor has reappeared where once they lay. You can still buy a variety of Jasper's Fairtrade and Organic coffee range but the vibe is now more one of a cafe than a coffee dealer. I visited this place with a friend just the other day and thoroughly enjoyed the relaxing atmosphere, sitting in the dim light of the cafe, watching the world go by outside. What's more, the cake cabinet is a truly mouth watering vision, and currently includes 5 gluten free desserts, no less tempting than the others (more so, if like me, you are intolerant to wheat!). My friend and I devoured a beautful Lindt chocolate, raspberry and almond cake which was paired just perfectly with a cup of coffee (Mine: Soy, Decaf Latte, My Friend: Long Black)
If you need a break from suburbia, come for a drive and check this place out. While you're in Sassafrass, take the time to explore another tempting find, just 2 doors down...

Shopping: Food
Cream, Mt Dandenong Tourist Rd, Sassafrass.
A friend told me about this place and it really is delicious!
Cream showcases a range of delectable gourmet food; oils, bread, cheese, dukkah, vinegars, pastries, sorbet, sweets and tea blends. All the stock is sourced from small Australian family owned producers, mostly from Victoria and South Australia.
Almost all the products are available to taste, and trust me, it's worth doing. I particularly recommend trying the Chilli Lime glaze - yum! 
Cream also put on regular dinners for around 25 people, showcasing the produce they offer. Well worth asking about. They also cater for food intolerances and allergies.




Richmond

Cafe
Richmond HIll Cafe & Larder, 48-50 Bridge Rd, Richmond.
OK, so most people already know about this place but I still reckon it's worth a mention. A very popular cafe spot in the bustling Bridge Rd shopping precinct. Good coffee, great staff, for what I know the food aint bad either. What really sets this place apart, however, is it's cheese larder. After entering through the front door, to the left of the cafe area is the larder, filled with a variety of cheeses; different varieties and ages. Plus, for those of you who are are both a cheese lover and on a tight budget, like me, there are free samples available - yay! But be careful... once you try, it's hard not to buy!


Cafe
Chimmys, 344 Bridge Rd, Richmond.
Recommended to me by a friend, this lovely little cafe (cafe by day, restaurant by night) situated away from the business of Bridge Rd's shopping and discount outlet scene, is rated 4/5 stars on urbanspoon.com and for good reason. First and foremost, Chimmys has good coffee. (Fairtrade). Beyond that, its also known for it's beautiful fresh bread, and delicious sweets. If you're 'eating in' the atmosphere is cosy and comfortable - with tables ranging from intimate to large communal tables, big enough to lay out several copies of 'The Age'. Tables out front are perfect for a lazy breakfast, brunch, or afternoon tea. 
If you haven't already tried it, give Chimmys a go.






That's all my recommendations for today! If you have already visited one of my above recommendations, do so as a result of this blog, or have somewhere else that you love, please share your experience by leaving a comment.

An Introduction to The Carribean Pink House.

August Boatwright: "Well, I don't know. Some things in life, like the color of a house, don't really matter. But lifting someone's heart? Now, that matters."
- The Secret Life of Bees (2008)
 
In deciding on a name for this blog, I decided on The Carribean Pink House, not because my intent is to write only about things that I percieve to 'truly matter'.  I intend, in fact, to sometimes write about things that, seemingly, have no greater meaning than a great place to get coffee or shop. However, I do think August has a point. Even seemingly insignificant decisions as the colour of your house, are motivated by something bigger; point to what you truly value.


Leunig puts it this way:
'There are only two feelings.
Love and fear.
There are only two languages.
Love and fear.
There are only two activities.
Love and fear.
There are only two motives, two procedures, two frameworks, two results.
Love and fear.
Love and fear.'


My hope is that as I write this blog, reflect and consider life and share things I have learned and experienced, I would find myself continually encouraged to consider the motivation behind my thoughts and actions. Is it love or fear?

The Carribean Pink House

Lily Owens:  If your favorite color is blue, why did you paint the house pink? 
August Boatwright:  [chuckles] That was May's doing. When we went to the paint shop, she latched on to a color called, "Caribbean Pink." She said it made her feel like dancing a Spanish Flamenco. I personally thought it was the tackiest color I had ever seen, but I figured if it could lift May's heart, it was good enough to live in. 
Lily Owens:  That was awfully nice of you. 
August Boatwright:  Well, I don't know. Some things in life, like the color of a house, don't really matter. But lifting someone's heart? Now, that matters.
- The Secret Life of Bees (2008)